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A Senior comes to Paradise

Part IV

Since my arrival, my people experience has been totally Filipino/a. Except as noted in previous Parts, I have been more than comfortable with my people environment.

First of all, the compound I live in is unique because it is essentially a family compound. The house I am in was finished shortly before I moved in. The compound is the remainder of substantial holdings of landlady’s deceased father who was a medical doctor. Landlady owns a bakery which is on the premises. She employs a staff of ten. At times she is tempted to stop but feels she cannot put so many out of work. She is the living personification of Mother Theresa. How often she has sent me goodies from her kitchen or bake shop. How many time has she volunteered her services and extensive contacts to sort out a personal problem. She does not believe in “tomorrow”. She does it right now. Her house is in the compound. Her 80 yr old mother has a separate house. Unfortunately, she has beginning Alzheimer's which has destroyed her short term memory. During pleasant weather, I often like to sit outside especially in the sun. Filipinos do not like the sun so on the streets thee are more umbrellas in sunny weather than in rainy. When they see me deliberately sitting in the sun, they think I am etched in the head. Of course that does prove how intelligent Filipinos are. LOL Often landlady’s mother whom I call grandma will have her helper bring her out to join me but not in the sun, which means I am in for an excruciating half hour of the same questions repeated over and over and over. She has no short term memory. In the meantime, her helper and my staff out of sight of grandma are laughing themselves silly at my discomfiture. Escape is impossible.

The affable husband of landlady is also the product of a substantial old family which once owned about half of famous Boracay island where they still have a resort. While his wife manages the compound with its hundreds of plants and trees many collected by grandma in her younger years, husband who is a serious cock fight enthusiast maintains a flock and staff. .These cocks are seriously confused or have been afflicted with strange jet lag. They obviously flunked cock crowing 101 because they start between three and four in the morning outside my bedroom window. In the first weeks, I developed a fierce hatred for these beasties. The term, ‘murder most fowl’ had special significance. I developed a passionate obsession for Kentucky Fried Chicken. I finally developed an antidote. I get out of bed at four in the morning but please don’t tell my nurse. I come to the computer and start writing or calling my son in California. Gradually, the cocks faded from consciousness and I lost my taste for Kentucky Fried Chicken. The cocks have won again! For me it is cock flight not cock fight !!

Another challenge is the compound location. We are at the end of the airport runway. Sometimes it sounds as though the jets are coming into my room. Again I have developed a tolerance. I defy the fates that challenge my desire and will to stay here. I think I am winning. Part of this is due to my reliance on “G.A” G. A. and I have a long standing relationship. During my driving days, if I wanted a parking space close to an entrance, one would always show up many times in the first ten tries LOL, Then the exhausted passengers are required to say “Thank you G.A.” (Guardian Angel). Ok I never said I was not eccentric. It really is fun and much easier the older you get. G. A. tends to be a show off. This is not the place to recount the many times my life has been saved. In short, I can fall off a cliff and land on a cloud. Thank you G.A for getting me to Paradise and helping me stay.

There are the compound guardians, a colony of four dogs given to shameless incest. The most curious case of which is the little old grandpa, Taboo with one eye and one ear that will not stand up who has managed to impregnate a big Labrador who can stand over grandpa without touching him. Talk about relentless ambition and extreme sport ! Then there is Brownie who hangs out on my doorstep because the housekeeper slips scraps to him. They all loudly announce any stranger that comes into the compound making a fearsome noise which doesn’t seem to scare anyone. I am sure that if there were a regular mailman, (is there such a creature here?), the guardians would be noisily delighted. When I was in college, I worked at the post office delivering mail during high volume times such as Christmas, so I am still mystified about mail delivery here. I have never received a personal snail mail. That does not worry me since I am an email addict.

Derek, name changed), landlady’s 22year old son is a recent graduate of St Augustine University in Iloilo with a business degree…My hiring of his girlfriend, Cher was a win affair. Cher moved in with me just yards from Derek’s house. He works with me alongside of CHER. They have established an unusually strong relationship and Derek has become a caring companion. Often the three of us will sit in my bedroom with my computer to just talk. The computer usually does not participate. I have loaned them my Macintosh PowerBooks with a complete set of programs including “Super Text Twist” a game which presents jumbled letters from which you make as many words as possible. Those rascals were delighted when they were able to beat my high score. Cher is brilliant. That is disgusting. That child who had never heard of a Macintosh computer, can now open my Quad G5 at one time the most powerful desktop in the world, and change the memory !!!! To add insult to injury, more than one time she has solved a computer problem that baffled me and she has done it in minutes !! Doesn’t she know I was working with Macintosh when she was a nursing infant! There out to be a law 1!! Doesn’t she know that I worked with computers before my children, that I actually taught retired professionals at one time!!

Like the late Rodney Dangerfield, I get no respect!

Cher does want to go to the States and if anyone ever finds out about her, I will lose a good nurse and companion. She would love to be involved with NASA’s

Space program. I am keeping Cher my private secret. That is why I am not too concerned about my salaries for Cher and Derek. For those who have expressed concern about the impact of their salaries, hospitals here pay private duty nurses 32,000 php per month. Cher is underpaid. They are precious gems which I have discovered. Don’t you tell now, hyeah !!!

Madam Dureen (name changed) does the household chores plus cooking. She starts administering medicine.

At 0600 in the morning and every hour thereafter until noon. After lunch, more medicines until 2200 (10:00 PM). Madame Dureen goes off at 2100( 9:00 PM) then Cher and Derek take over. They give my final medication at 2200 (10:00 – now you did not notice, I am showing off). I go to bed at midnight. Madam Dureen’s duties do not stop with medical administration but include preparing the hot water for my daily bath. I have a perfectly good shower but the water from the deep well tends to be hard, so every morning water is boiled and I cool it to the temperature I like and can stand. I like hot water. Madam Dureen believes I am not competent to bathe myself so despite some misgivings, I let her wash my back. which she does with an intensity mindful of Shakespeare’s Lady Macbeth: “Out out damned spot” Madame tests the temperature of the water by pouring it on my back and measuring the volume of my screams. Then she mumbles mmuhot? It is very effective! Why don’t I tell her? Well our communication is somewhat less than Cambridge I can’t understand her mumbles and she does not understand mine. Oh well, the screams seem to work.

The frequent hospital visits, the doctors bills and daily medicines began to put a squeeze on my budget. In the States I could never have afforded this personally but then I had excellent Federal Employee Blue Cross/Blue Shield with a hefty monthly premium (a little less than $300) which I had been paying for years. But I got my own in my latter days in the States. Once here, I began to consider canceling assuming no BC/BS coverage here, because the monthly premium alone could cover much of medical expense. Four of my five doctors charge 300 p or $5.91per visit. My regular doctor. charges a “foreigner” fee of 500p $9.86 at today’s exchange rate of $1.00 = 50.73 php.There are tests which cost more and the daily medication which begin to mount. I was on the verge of asking son to cancel Blue C/Blue S which would be irreversible, when I stumbled on info that their coverage was worldwide. (Thank you G.A.) So Cher and Derek set about collecting all of the required hospital info and receipts, medical receipts which Cee had kept in a folder. They spent day and night over ten days preparing the claims for reimbursement. Then they fedexed claims and sure enough reimbursements started trickling in. Let’s hear it for G.A.! (such a showoff !!! I could do with a little less brinkmanship )

One could be critical of my lifestyle here because I am living in a privileged cocoon. Landlady and family cannot be described as poverty stricken. I can say that there is an awareness but like so many wealthy, a bit of patronization creeps in. I am accepted as a member of the family and the extended family is in the United States. Landlady’s brother works at Carnegie Hall although he is a trained lawyer. One other brother is a Psychiatrist in the US and a third brother practices medicine there. One brother and a grandfather had been famous in the RP as basketball players. At least one played on Philippines’ Olympic team. The family owns one of the 7107 islands. They plan to developed it. I am distressed at the devastating effect of the oil spill which is affecting this area and destroying so many lives. In the compound it is a matter of casual comment but then I am not having dinner with the family so it is unfair to characterize them as unfeeling.

There have been several surprises for me here in addition to demented cocks of crowing persuasion.So far none are deal breakers but I do wonder are there explanations such as why are the toilet seats removed in public toilets even hospitals? Don’t you miss the toilet paper? Why are incandescent lamps so hard to find? Is it my imagination, or is reading a rare phenomenon among Filipinos? How do the truly poor and there are many of them, manage their medical and health requirements? Ilongo speakers when using English, Say: “I will be the one to (verb e.g. “go. Do etc”) instead of “I will go” Does this construction apply throughout the Philippines's?

Are the allegations of corruption in government and the halls of the high and mighty really true? If so, is there any element in or outside of government sincerely dedicated to change? Is it true that western media has ignored the oil spill a major disaster in the Visayas.? Is traffic regulated by rule or by custom?

Finally, I have to admit that all the evidence I have support the premise that age really makes no difference. Not only that but so many young women express a preference for older men. Of course one could explain that in several ways. They suspect that I am too old to roam. I will neither affirm nor deny. Old men are likely to have resources and financial stability. Well, it COULD happen ! They will not be troubled by insistent physical demands. Don’t woke ‘em let ‘em slept. Oh yes, G.A. has a warped sense of humor. Now,

I am plunked into a vat of honey after I lost my taste buds. If you think that is something, get a load of this. Years ago in the States I subscribed to a Free Lotto service. They post your numbers automatically. Then I gradually forgot about it. In the past month I have been getting almost daily notices that I have won not only one but TWO MILLION dollars. So why am I sitting here? I do not have the required numbers that I must submit to collect !! G.A. are you telling me something? And don’t give me “It’s only money crap!” It is life changing, American style house on a beach, long lost kinfolks, new loves, friends you don’t need, happy grandchildren, travel – first class etc etc. On the other hand that is now dream deferred and I have the advantage of realizing that all my life has been rich. I just never had money.

So, I have always been and remain eccentric.

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