If you haven't read this, please do. It is an inspiring look at the culture we're so involved with, and a great reminder of why! Excerpt: Explaining the phenomenon is more difficult. The usual hypothesis puts it down to the unique ethnic and historical cocktail that is Philippine culture-Malay roots (warm, sensual, mystical) mixed with the Catholicism and fiesta spirit of the former Spanish colonizers, to which is added a dash of western flavour from the islands' days as an American colony. Mr de Leon, after a decade of researching, has concluded that Filipino culture is the most inclusive and open of all those he has studied. It is the opposite of the individualistic culture of the West, with its emphasis on privacy and personal fulfillment. It is also the opposite of certain collectivistic cultures, as one finds them in Confucian societies, that value hierarchy and ""face"". By contrast, Filipino culture is based on the notion of kapwa, a Tagalog word that roughly translates into ""shared being"". In essence, it means that most Filipinos, deep down, do not believe that their own existence is separable from that of the people around them. Everything, from pain to a snack or a joke, is there to be shared. Guests in Filipino homes, for instance, are usually expected to stay in the hosts' own nuptial bed, while the displaced couple sleeps on the floor. Small-talk tends to get so intimate so quickly that many westerners recoil. ""The strongest social urge of the Filipino is to connect, to become one with people,"" says Mr de Leon. As a result, he believes, there is much less loneliness among them.

Ok, I just went back and read the whole string. Normal AsiaTravel rate for the Marriott was $56USD, which was P2,800 summer of 2000. They would apply discounts to room bills at certain intervals (i.e. P100,000, etc.) but this varied customer to customer and was not published. So I have no idea what rate my friend finally got. I believe that he is their #1 customer or at least in the top 5. I wouldn't mind paying P1,200/night for a 30 night stay. They do hit you for P360++ for breakfast buffet, which ain't cheap. I always enjoyed it cause it was ""free"", included in my room price. >From a $$ perspective, The Century Peak Suite was a better deal than the Marriott, also another place had a suite (on the way to Redemptorist) for under P20K per month. But the Century was out of the way for me and it was not the Marriott. The facilities at the Marriott (grounds, rooms) and service are superior to most other hotels that I've stayed at in the Phils, Including Ft Ilocondia, Pan Pacific, Traders, etc. Even tho the Marriott is probably only 4 years old, it is starting to show it's age. I've stayed in the same room (1008) over the last 18 months and it does show it's wear. Also, the in the restaurant, the steps leading down to the lower area are cracked and a few other things. I was at the Apo View in April and thought the general areas were close to the Marriott but the rooms looked a little worn; when I showed up at the Marriott, I was surprised to see that 1008 wasn't as pristine as I remembered it. Service at the Marriott was exceptional in the past but there were a few glitches on my last trip. I've found the food to be great and the best buffet I've ever been to was Christmas Eve, 2000. When I stay there, I usually check out the buffet each afternoon, to see if I will be there for dinner. If they have 3 entrees that appeal to me, I usually eat there. But on Christmas Eve, everything appealed to me, so we ate there. Their Fried Calamari is the best I've had and I don't order it here in the US anymore. But it ain't cheap at P400++ for lunch and dinner, not including beverage. In Davao, I would eat breakfast at the Apo (free) and have lunch and dinner out, lots of great restaurants or at a friend's house. Harrara's stands out in my memory as does Jack Ridge (locals call it Jack's Ridge). To compare it to the Apo View, th food and service at the Marriott are far superior, the facilities are slightly superior. But the Apo View, at Summit Club rate of P999, gets my vote and I will spend most of my time in Davao this trip. The hotel is not the only reason, my fiance has a slight aversion to Cebu and most of my friends that I meet in Cebu will be out of town during the week that I had hoped to be there. Plus I want Ligaya to meet some friends of mine in Davao. And this is a budget trip, so I am looking to limit my hotel expense to around P1,000/night and will not get to negotiate any long term stays, cause I'll be moving around. Back to your original issue, the gym facilities; never saw them in all my nights there and my body is proof of that. ""Doc"", a chiropractor friend, used it daily as did the hotel Dr, a 30ish tall good looking lady, who I got to see every visit cause of allergies then sinusitus. I'm getting a head start on next Saturday's departure, have sinusitus and my RX will wear out on my date of arrival. No messing around this time, will pick up new RX over the counter in Manila. For some reason Cebu always messes with my sinuses but Davao and Laoag have not, so far. Happy New Year,

I purchased a new jeepney in Cagayan de Oro last March for around $8500 US dollars. (At that time, I think the peso was around 47/dollar) The brand name of it was ""Desa"" and was manufactured in Manila. My father in law did the research with other jeepney drivers which jeepney was the best built. On their advice, it was the Desa we chose. On a handshake, my father in law agreed to pay me back in five years at 12%. So far, he has made all his payments. I think his average daily take after the loan payment and his fuel is around 500 - 800 pesos. There was really no other option other than to buy the thing right out. Investigated putting a partial down for the jeepney. We found that half was due upon signing and the other half to be paid in two years at 70% interest rate. Any failure to pay on time would have meant possible repo of the jeepney at anytime. There would have been no way for the guy to make the payments. I think his real money is made on the weekends and holidays when he hires himself out to families or groups that want to go somewhere. He drops them off, goes back to work then returns later to get the group. He also makes a run to a local factory early in the morning to take employees there before he does his daily run. In the evening he picks them up and takes them home. An idea that I have when my wife and I move to the Philippines in a few years is to purchase numerous pedicabs and and tricycles and lease them out on a daily basis. I believe the income to investment ratio is better than a larger capitol expense for one vehicle. I will not know if this theory is true though until we move there and do some real research on this idea.

Hope you appreciate that I took the time to delete all of the references so you don't have to scan for 10 minutes to find a reply to a comment made yesterday or last week (hint, hint). We will make a permanent move to PI in about 2 years. If the cost of living estimates I have seen hold true, we will be reasonably well off. (I particularly liked Bill L's, since I know him and and have met some of his employees). However, for me, ""retirement"" is not my goal. My wife and I think of advancing to another phase of life, and that includes work. In anticipation, I have interviewed for several professional jobs. I am a Ph.D. psychologist, and have experience in management, hospitals, private practice, and teaching. My wife is a computer engineer. I have interviewed for hospital administrator, practioner, college instructor, and Bantay Bata (an organization that addresses child abuse and domestic violence). In addition, I and a partner in the US have attempted a couple of small businesses... (export to US), one is kaput and one is on hold. We discuss variations on the ones we have tried and new ideas. >From my interviews, I conclude that in the PI, and in my industry, foreigners are not really looked upon as a new source for the provision of services. We are competing with nationals who need the pesos far more than we do, and they have far more influence with family members and friends in positions of influence in the organizations. They seemed to be impressed by my credentials and were very willing to enlarge their libraries by my contribution of collected books (from university classes), since their libraries are sparsely stocked and ancient. They would accept my services if they were virtually voluntary, but, they wanted me to work full time. I write all of this to make the point that ""transitioning"" to a new way of life in the Philippines that includes work, requires some pretty intensive planning and efforts. And to my way of thinking, moving somewhere without future, productive goals (emphacis on productive) is short sighted if not short lived.

This is a great article that contains the key to the whole mystery. Kapwa has never been explainded so well so briefly as De Leon does in this piece. Thank you for the important post. I hope all read it. It will let you understand at least intellectually if not emotionally who you are to Filipinos and who they they are to themselves. There is much more to be said than in his article, but what he says is on target. He knows what makes Filipinos unique. I am leaving in the part Tom posted. (Excuse me, Ron. I certainly agree with you about cutting the repeats, but this one is an exception.) If you read it, it is worth reading again, friends.

I may be missing something, but I can't see any reason why an airline, Filipino or foreign, would want to use Davao as a ""stopping/connecting point"" or for ""picking up or discharging passengers"". There isn't enough local business to justify it and the planes don't need to stop to refuel any more. There will have to be a ""critical mass"" of activity there before any airline would consider doing something like that. You know, the old ""chicken and egg"" dilemna? I just don't see it happening in our lifetime.

Subject: Re: Marriott Hotel, Cebu (including the fitness center) Reply to Rick, re: Gym Facilities in Cebu. I'm currently a member at Annie's Fitness Center in SM Mall. Currently, their monthly rate is P1,400 (for use of exercise equipment and shower, only). They have good equipment, and the staff is nice. The facility is currently ""For Sale."" I mention this because there are a lot of little improvements that need to be made to make it a first-class gym. The major deficiency at Annie's is the very small dressing room and shower for the men. The gym at the Marriott is a lot classier than Annie's, and not that much more expensive. As previously stated, you can join the gym for P1,200/mo. if you limit your visits to the hours of 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. The also have a 20-visit plan (anytime), with no expiration, for P2,000. I visited one other gym (associated with a university) near Colon St., but it was free weights, only. If you like machines and stationary cycles and/or treadmills, it's not the place for you. Hop this helps.

Thanks for trying to call. It is appreciated. This morning, Don Herrington provided the name of a doctor near Cebu Dr's Hospital. I just tried to find the office, but I didn't have any luck. It's possible the doctor changed offices. No problem. Don also encouraged me to stop-by Chong Hua, even though it's not an emergency. I'm still feeling bad, so after I type this, I'm headed to the hospital. Thanks, to all of you, for your advice and concern!

Thanks for the additional info re the gym. Marriott would be the most convenient for me and it also sounds like the nicest at a competitive price. I'll check it out later this week after the holidaze are over with. If anyone has any further suggestions I would love to hear them.

Contact Jupiter Air Freight which has a separate dept. for booking courier flights. One of our Townhouse Hotel guests I met last week flew for $550 which is a bit high. I use to pay $350 to $450 SFO - Manila RT with a 30 day maximum stay. JAL requires you to stay in Tokyo one night each way with a FREE hotel, meals and transfers. NWA airlines use to charge their couriers more but without a time limit. Flying to Hong Kong is usually cheaper and I can send youan Indian travel agent who you can buy a $268 HK -MNL RT ticket. If you pay a $60+ membership fee to either of two organizations both with similiar names like "" International Air Couriers Association"" one in Florida and the other in Colorado you will be sent details and addresses of courier companies and join a LAST MINUTE (24 hour ) air courier list with fares of only $100 to $200. Most courier deals allow you the same amount of check-in luggage ( higher fares ) but others ( cheaper fares ) allow you hand carry only. You meet an agent at the airport of your destination which you give a large envelope so he clears customs and when you leave you pick up the same type envelope ( but often they don't have anything so tell just to go ahead and checkin ). When you have the time check out my new 15 page Philippines Budget Travel website

Hotel Pricing in the Philippines - Name Brands I've followed the Cebu Marriott discussion and the lack of a substantial discount? Hotels are a problem in the Philippines component of tourism. They have been a problem ever since I've been going to the Philippines, which is since at least 1962. I've written about this frequently. Its a private sector practices problem. The tourism people in the Philippines have advised the private sector of this, but they don't budge. Most hotels in the Philippines are owned privately, like in the rest of the world. Then the owners go to a hotel management company - Marriott, Melia, Sheraton etc. to run their hotels. It seems that the hotel management companies take their commission for management off of gross revenues. So even if a hotel doesn't make money the management company does (and there may be some tax advantages to losing money for the owners, on some of these hotels, offsetting their other revenues). The hotel practices in the Philippines ignore reasonable marketing practices in pricing and advertising. Most hotels don't seem to work towards capacity-based and -building pricing. They maintain fairly high prices, or a two-tiered pricing system (foreign/local) year round. They don't usually lower their prices too much, during low usage seasons, to stimulate high occupancy year round. They don't think out too far, about monthly rates. They don't publish lower rates, although you can frequently ""bargain"" in the Philippines. Foreign visitors don't want to waste a day, bargaining and shopping hotels. The same pricing structure is used by PAL for its international flights, from the Philippines. I believe the high season is about 8 - 10 months, and PAL sets pricing monthly rather then by the season, with pricing seemingly only going up. Here in North America there is a lot of pricing that is lowered to generate high occupancy. There are very distinct seasons - Christmas high, Spring low in most cities except Florida when its high, prices drop usually after Easter. This is even more noticeable now since September 11, but it has always been there. Published, republished, advertised, on the internet. In the Philippines look for the changes - where? In Thailand, with hotel pricing connected to local currency, when their bhat collapsed a few years ago, international tourism saw that hotel prices were an even bigger bargain, and foreign tourists flocked there. The hotels were kept filled, as were airplane seats. The visitors shopped and helped the economy where they bought foods, silks, reasonably priced tours (an oxymoron in the Philippines), and enjoyed themselves - while contributing to many parts of the local economy and generating loads of jobs. But for the Philippines - linked to artificially high dollar prices, real tourism skips the country because it isn't tourism hotel or tour information friendly. For an outsider you can't go to a city website, and then from there to the hotels and see their current REAL or LOWEST pricing, and their promotions. You can't pick up the Sunday paper and look for the hotel specials. Most hotels are not listed with the major hotel wholesalers, such as UTELL, and when they are they don't show promotions. Pricing is normally overinflated and in dollars. A major guidebook produced by the Far Eastern Economic Review for all of Asia, talking about the Philippines says ""discounts from 20-50% are available at many hotels, particularly in Manila, which often has more rooms then tourists. It is always worth asking when making a booking."" And for hotels outside of Manila it says ""Prices are lower, but not always as low as they might be given the standard of facilities."" In the Official Hotel Guide, used extensively in North America, the total pages for Philippine hotels is 1 1/2 pages, you pay to be listed. In the Spring 2002 book Thailand has 4 1/2 pages of listings, nearly all in local currency, and nearly all represented by an international wholesaler. The Philippines listing doesn't include many wholesaler contacts, and artificially high pricing, usually in dollars, so one can't take advantage of the weakened local currency. As an example, for the province of Cebu there are only 6 hotels listed and the dollar prices are ridiculous: CEBU: Midtown singles from $95-105; Cebu Plaza from $120 - 200; Golden Tulip Philippine Dream Hotel from $80 to $150; and the Marriott Cebu City Hotel from $130. On Mactan there are 2 properties listed: Maribago Bluewater Beach Resort from $130 and the Waterfront Mactan Island Hotel and Casino from $180. (The Shangri-La is not listed, but does have rational pricing.)You and I both know that no one pays the above prices. And most people would ignore the city if they saw these prices. (All prices shown are for a room for one person - usually a couple pays a little more.) As an alternative Iloilo lists pricing in pesos, as does Legaspi City, In Davao The Marco Polo lists from $55 and the Mercure Grand from $58. The Marco Polo does have very good hotel practices, is a 5* and is price competitive, and internationally accessible via the internet. A few of the Manila chains also are very price competitive. Davao City hotels in general do have good hotel practices.

A chain of hotels or restaurants generally don't haggle. If they are charging $25 per night, then not only are they making money, but they are getting all the guests that they need and providing an American-quality room. Succeeding in a discount would be like going to Hard Rock Cafe in Glorietta and haggling down the steak dinner.. it's not happening. If Marriott is not making any money, they will either go out of business or lower their rates. They may even be willing to take a regional loss if it means keeping their name out there in an international city. I think I paid P900 ($18) per night at a hotel in Camarines Sur, supposedly the top hotel in the city, but its furniture appeared to be 20 years old and the A/C was a window unit. I cannot think of one for less than $75 in the states). $25? WOW... that's where I'll stay in Cebu if I want to pretend I'm not in a third-world country!

Try calling the expensive hotels like the Marriott (232-6100) or Waterfront or Cebu Plaza and see if the clerk will recommend something to you. The upper-scale hotels probably have a line on a good doctor that meets your needs (you could tell them you're calling from the airport and needed to see one before you check-in, etc.). If you are an American Express card holder, try calling Adventure Int'l in Cebu. Since they are a partner with Amex, they may have a lead on something (Amex travel is known for their medical.prescipt. assistance in emergencies and maybe they have leads). Good luck.

On the old flights from the U.S. to Indonesia they couldn't make the entire routing without a refueling stop. I think it was in Amboy. Nothing there, just a refueling stop. There are problems in Indonesia, which has resulted in the loss of their national carrier, but Bali and Jakarta are still important destinations. They need a stable refueling stop. Now the routing is very long and wastes time. Airlines work with the ideas of hubs and spokes. They look for less used but international length runways for connections. Price, and competition are important. Manila is now controlled by PAL and is a difficult airport for hotels, transfers etc. Japan is now the major east-west hub going into Asia, from North America BUT many planes can now fly further and could use an alternative airport for transfers. Davao, when the new runway and control towers are open, will offer an international size and scaled airport for flights to Indonesia, Thailand, Singapore and even Australia. It would require the Philippines to change to 4th and 5th Fly Rights - but they may be willing to do this, using Davao, since it would have limited impact on PAL. Cebu could also do this. Davao has the advantage of reasonably priced hotel rooms, in the case of flight delays or an emergency. And there is some limited tourism opportunities over a 2 - 3 day stayover that could be developed (monkey ea! ting eagle station, orchid farm, talomo beach, trekking to Mt. Apo, the potential for the casino, and the Pearl Farm for honeymooners etc.) There are no easy and economical north-south routes in Asia. You can fly cheaply U.S. to Asia, and U.S. to Australia but not cheaply on a circle Asia flight combining both routings. Northern Australia is interesting but you normally have to go in through the south of Australia, via Sydney. Flights from the Philippines connecting through Davao could go to quickly to northern Australia and to the Great Barrier Reef. There are lots of options and logic to using Davao, just for many of the reasons that you think it wouldn't be of any value.

Low fares to the Philippines, Asia, Europe, the Caribbean, Central & South America. For reservations & a quote E-mail me travelers passport names, ages, dates of travel, city begin in, city going to, & a home phone number. Follow it up with a phone call. Call & visit our website for cruise & tour specials.

It is a great place, especially at P1,200 or P1,300 night. I just noticed that Century Peak (on asiatravel.com) is now ""The Golden Peak"", maybe a change of ownership? The biz suite is now P28,000 month, I thought it was cheaper last year, P18,000, maybe I'm mistaken. I believe it is near Lahug, near Seafood City. The Richmond Plaza had similar rates for a month or longer (suite or 2 BR condo) but the special is no longer listed at asiatravel.com.

Just to add some more (subjective) notes on this topic based on my own idiosyncratic experience building my consulting business in Manila. May be relevant for those who want to relocate here but are not independently wealthy. 1. Dr. Mike is doing it correctly as far as scoping out his options, clarifying his own goals, doing exploratory work, networking, etc. (BTW, Bantay Bata does really good work, I do know (casually) Gina Lopez, the Lopez family member whose heart is in the right place and who handles the philantrophic part of the Lopez fortune -- their business interests have been bleeding throughout 2001 and it is to their credit that they are still doing charity stuff, including the La Mesa Watershed project -- where they are soliciting corporate money to reforest the main watershed that gives Manila much of its water, it is in bad shape -- as well as the battered kids porject and other good works).... Mike's assessment is correct: they will welcome his expertise and books, and listen deferentially to what he has to say. But expecting reasonable remuneration for professional services here is problematic, and interviewing for jobs isn't going to be the answer for most. 2. Would suggest Mike begin to think in terms of consulting work and use the web to build networks; I had three months ""notice"" in LA when we decided to come here, and I beat the Internet to death throughout that period, and also ran up a hell of a phone bill. But I had a rudimentary network when I arrived, had appointments solidly scheduled by week #2, and had (some) local consulting work within a month. (not that it was a piece of cake, it wasn't, but the preparatory networking was essential; in Mike's case, he has a lot more lead time so should be able to do a more thorough job of it. 3. Re: getting a job abroad with a multinational and getting transferred here is almost impossible, at least if your motivation is to get a posting to RP. MNCs give plum ex-pat assignments to execs who have shown their mettle and who are on fast-track career paths -- it is not cheap to send someone here, what with house lease in ex-pat village (always one year prepaid), car, tuition at international school for kids, other perks. (those are things I have done without, sigh...) And now many MNCs are cutting back ex-pat staff and, in many cases, when their contracts expire they are not renewing, hiring locally instead. All you have to do is walk around the streets here in San Lo (that's San Lorenzo Village, in Makati) and look at all the ""for rent"" signs. It is now a renters' market and rumor has it that landlords are now leasing nice houses in the Makati villages at terms they would never have imagined in the past (i.e., two months deposit + two months rent); traditionally it has been two months depost + 12 months rent). Only big companies will give the latter anymore, and they ain't bringing any new ex-pats in unless they absolutely have to. 4. In a previous post I commented on the salaries earned by call center reps and IT jocks -- salaries that are unacceptably low for I would guess 99% of Americans/Europeans. However, professional scales are equally below intl. standards. Even full, tenured professors at AIM (where I teach as part time faculty) earn only about P100K a month ($2000), which is the highest pay of any academic institution in the country. (Although practically all of 'em make multiple times that in consulting fees). At the mid-professional level, Vice Presidents or Directors in some of the companies I am familiar with may make around P50-75,000 -- approaching $1500 a month -- and that is considered a very high salary here. 5. Returning to Mike's post -- sounds like you are in a similar position to my own when I came here, so feel free to contact me directly if I can be of assistance, could possibly give you leads. Many of my stateside clients (during my 15 years in LA) were shrinks, and I still do work for a few such professionals around the globe (editing, research, etc.) -- if you have certain skills you can also make money here using the web (as I believe some members of this group do). The web makes geography irrelevant, etc. 6. Even with on-the-ground consulting, there are ways to survive here. In my case, I have worked hard to build credibility in the local business community, and appear to have succeeded. i.e., I am know a little bit, people like me and don't see me as a carpetbagger, people know I am never a pushy ugly American, etc. The problem is that, by having bent over to be culturally sympatico, I weakened my own economic value -- i.e., they think of you as a local, they want to treat you as a local. And I made the mistake of allowing that to happen and found myself either getting undercut on price by local consultants or having to work for near-local consulting rates (which are higher than the salaries cited in pt #4 above but still nowhere near what a well-qualified management consultant should be earning). 7. For the last year I have been working to reposition myself as an international consultant -- I have good Filipino friends who have persistently encouraged me to do so (excuse any slight, but verbatim comments run to: ""take advantage of your white face"" and ""let me manage your Kano image"") -- (another anecdote: the e-services manager for a major intl. consulting firm told me their definition of a ""consultant"" is an American flown in for business assistance -- they try to use local (filipino) talent as much as they can, but clients balk at that -- they attribute credibility to the foreigner, a reverse cultural inferiority complex of some kind that I still haven't figured out, especially given the excellent skills that many Filipino consultants have. Neveretheless, my own positioning now is much higher level -- I refuse to compete on rates, emphasize the high quality of my work, and tell 'em they get what they pay for. Sorry for the sidetrack, hope these notes are relevant for some.

This story has been told many times, but it brings tears to your eyes every time you hear it. The movie, Anak, presents a fascinating view of the Hong Kong OCWs' family sacrifices.

What you are describing could be many things, however the description fits the symptoms of appedicitis. DO NOT screw around with this... it is potentually life threatening.

Hi everybody , I am new to the list, My fiance is taking my home to SanCarlos Pangasinan 1/25/2002.. We met in California.. Not sure what there is to due.. I do not drink, smoke ,gamble or sing very well.. I do not know what i am going to do for a month.. It looks like the plan is to stay in SanCarlos City an go from family to family's house partying everynight.. I like to swim, bikeride, explore new area's.. Babe says Can not leave the house with out her or a close family member..I also carry a Rex Applegate knife in the United States every where go.. Can I carry the knife in Pangasinan.. I am little worried about safety never leaving the U.S.A before.. Maraming Salamat po for any info

Skid, You'll have trouble taking that knife with you on the air flight. A month guarded by the family in San Carlos might get pretty dull. My wife is also from Pangasinan (Lingayen) and I have stayed in the family home for extended periods of time. Fortunately, I have a healthy taste for good beer, and I wasn't disappointed there. While visiting there, you should have the family take you to Hundred Islands and Baguio, both with reasonable travel distances from your base in San Carlos.

This story has been told many times, but it brings tears to your eyes every time you hear it. The movie, Anak, presents a fascinating view of the Hong Kong OCWs' family sacrifices. WHAT ABOUT THE FIRST TIME YOU READ IT? i guess most of us on this list are aware of the willingness of the Filipinos to sacrifice, but this is the first time i have read such an article about it. i have to admit that i was blubbering like a baby, but of course, i was in my office alone. i can't even share it with my wife without the same reaction, so i just print it out for her to read. How can anyone concentrate on the faults of the Filipinos when they demonstrate this kind of Human Spirit and Sacrifice. This is exactly what i mean when i say that the ""Filipino is so rich in many ways"".

I know nothing about San Carlos. You can probably get your knife in your check-ins leaving the US (don't attempt to carry it on the flights). However, departing San Carlos, you may have a hard time getting the knife back stateside because Ninoy-Aquino international terminals scan all of your luggage before you can check it in. Don't know if NAI has problems with knives yet, but they did with handcuffs (personal experience). Maybe best to mail it back to the states before you leave. Hope you are a samurai if you must use it! I personally carry a small, heavy metal baton for defense (but I really don't see much threat unless walking alone in the streets of Manila late at night.)

My brother-in-law Boy Parreno is coming to Samar January 7 for his nephews wedding. Security is no problem to him as long as the beer flows his nephew is in the military. He is from Lancaster PA anyone want any shoo-fly pie Merry Christmas & Happy New Year Harry & Sally Mong and Family

I don't think she is being overprotective or overly jealous. I think she is being smart. It takes a little while to learn how to operate safely in the Philippines; it may be learning how to protect ones self from common street crime or how to avoid the risk of terrorist threat. For the average visitor to the Philippines, I feel the risk is limited to street crime, but there is always the issue of being at the wrong place at the wrong time. No need to get hysterical over what could happen. I think he needs to respect his fiancée's request, and then illustrate that he knows how to keep his head up and avoid any potential situations. Plus, he will always have a Filipino close at hand who can help him with the language or culture issues that may arise. It isn't a matter of machismo or the fact that he may be irresistible to the opposite sex; it is a matter of being safe and learning a new culture. She cares for him and is trying to look out for his best interests. Here is an interesting thought, would it be an issue of discussion if the table was reversed and it was a non-Filipino woman coming to visit? Would a second thought be given to having her escorted when she left the compound? HMMMM? I am not a feminist, by any means, and I have a halfway decent head on my shoulders. I don't find it odd to go out in the company of my driver; being new here is incredible overwhelming at times.

I'm not a sexist either, but don't you think that a woman out alone at night (or day for that matter) would be more likely to be seen as a potential victim by a criminal than a man? Lets face it, rightly or wrongly, women are thought to be weaker and more vulnerable, particularly in this Filipino society.

HSan Carlos City Jim, Don't be alarmed by your host's need to accompany you. It's a requirement to take good care of guests, especially rich foreign guests! They will most likely go far beyond reason to try to entertain you and keep you happy. So lay back and enjoy the experience. Safety in the RP is like safety at home. Be aware of your surroundings, trust your companion's judgements and don't do anything stupid. Become accustomed to cold water bathing and eating green mangos, longanisa, rice and balute! You are about to have the adventure of a lifetime, so keep your mind open and enjoy! About your knife. I have no idea what a Rex Applegate knife is, but if you take a knife you'll have to pack it in your check-in luggage. I carry a Swiss Army pocket knife myself and find it useful. If you think you need it for defense, then you are making your first mistake! Anything you might carry will be outmatched. So forget about that kind of nonsense and concentrate on having a good time and have a happy trip...

Oh, absolutely, women are seen as more vulnerable here. Just throwing some gas on the fire. Felt like stirring up some conversation. My husband would have a coronary if I just hit the streets without giving him a heads up on where I was going. A woman is considered an easier target and typically is. I know if I were affected by street crime, especially if I had my children with me, I would be devastated. I am from middle-sized town, Middle America. It is an adjustment just learning how to be city smart. I do appreciate the extra care offered to women in this culture.

What a great way to express ourselves and learn. The value of this list is ongoing. Ron, surely you jest again. Green mangos, longanisa, and balute?? If this is required for a full adjustment to Filipino culture, I guess I had better stay home. (-: How about jumping salad, chocolate meat, lechon, pigs feet, etc? As for me, I don't partake, and the quite understanding and kind people of the Philippines don't lay that demand on me, and never have. Thank God!! One more reason for loving the Filipinos, and I do!! I resolve to never feel like I am as important as they treat me. As for jealousy, well, I consider it an abberation, unless someone has cheated, lied, or given a reason for it. I believe in honest and open relationships. Trust is a must or life's a bust. The truth will set you free. Without truth, we cannot make intelligent decisions. Real love is unconditional. I'm not a Bible thumper, but even the Bible list's jealousy as a sin. I only insert this info in case someone out there may not already know this and may need an authority higher than me. (-: But, whada wino?

Yes, Lucien, Your point is well taken. Manila is a zoo. You need to be careful. Your story reminds me of something that happened to me in a small but upscale town, Rosslyn,Virginia, where they roll up the streets at 9:00 pm. But I was out at 8:30 pm and ended up beaten, bruised, robbed and bleeding in a ditch, in a very nice residential area a block from my condo where there had never been a mugging. Crime, like rust, never sleeps. And can be found in the most unlikely places. Carrying a weapon is a option. But we all know that a weapon can be used against you. Common sense my weapon of choice.

You are lucky indeed. I had one Filipina wife like yours. I another one who would not let me go out alone, but only because she thought I might spend money on something or someone other than her. She had no love for me or for herself. There are all kinds. The one I have now is like yours, in that she loves me very much and herself too. But she trusts my judgment, knows I know the ropes, use commons sense, is not possessive and need my freedom. She still worries, but I make the decisions and she respects that. I respect her and her decisions too. There is compete mutual trust. That has not always been the case. I feel blessed. Karika's post makes a lot of sense. But I think few realize how sought after an old broken down foreigner is some decent and attractive but often poor, young Filipinas here. There is cause to be worried about your man straying, if you are Filipina, even a beautiful one. There is hot and heavy competition for foreign men here. And sometimes a man will stray when a young Filipina beauty comes his way and asks about his availability. Not me, of course, never!

I am really playing the opposite side of the fence today, Karika. Maybe the new year has made me contrary. Do consider where ever you go, you will be watched by everyone, man woman and children. Many Filipino men would be thrilled to rescue you. But if you follow the advice of others and continue your past course, that they will probably not have the opportunity to assist you. And that is better for all. atter?

Thank you for your recent post, which allowed everyone to know that you are doing better. I know that there are many who have expressed their well wishes and gratitude for your return. I hope that you don't allow our desires, hopes, and expectations to get in the way of your own needs. Don't worry, my friend. Right now one of the best things I can do is to be active and regain many of the skills that suffered during my stroke. That is why doing simple things like e-mail can be very important. When I have come close to reaching my limit I know when that is, so I can then go home and rest. But, every day I feel better. Now I am even back to driving myself again, and that is great!

Hi Thank you very much. Don't worry, I will hang around here as long as I still can! Hopefully that will be for a long time yet to come! As for my posts, I am glad you enjoy them. I hope that over the coming weeks I will be able to post a lot more regularly! I also enjoy reading the other posts on the list. Take care!

You are lucky indeed. I had one Filipina wife like yours. And I had another one who would not let me go out alone, but only because she thought I might spend money on something or someone other than her. She had no love for me or for herself. There are all kinds. The one I have now is like yours, in that she loves me very much and herself too. But she trusts my judgment, knows I know a few of the ropes, and use commons sense most of the time. She is not possessive and understands I need my freedom. She has trust in me as I do in her, her judgment and her honesty. She still worries, but I make my own decisions and she respects that. I respect her and her decisions too. There is compete mutual trust. That has not always been the case in my relationships. I feel blessed, like you, Nathan. May others be as lucky as we are. Karika's post makes a lot of sense. But I think too few realize how sought after an old broken down foreigner is some decent and attractive, but often poor, heartbroken and need, young Filipinas here. Support and maturity is attractive as good looks to someone who has already had a bad experience with handsome Juan. There is cause to be worried about your man straying, if you are Filipina, even a beautiful one. There is hot and heavy competition for foreign men here. And sometimes a man will stray when a young Filipina beauty comes his way and asks about his availability. But if he is happy at home, he comes home to mama and forgets the momentary lapse, even swearing to never do it again. Or so I have been told. I never experienced it myself, of course! What was that Niles just said about truth and honesty?